well.. i didnt even study for one bit today.. Dnt, didnt even crossed my mind until now... HOOORAY! so much for the, "YES! weekend's here.. lotsa things i can do since im not working"
id rather be working cuz ill be earning for every minute that i did today.. damn. anyways.. went to the gym.. forgot to call sandy to go study but went out instead..
Gome sandy..
its like 4:04am now la..
i cant sleep. this is the part where its really bad.. its like.. ill think of her.. like rmbring the past.. fuck. i fucking hate this. Why is it so fucking difficult to get over her.. she s out for money.. all these while.. and i still love her this fucking much.. god quickly get me a malay girl. please.
i just pictured her and her money bank'[boyfriend] HAHA.. just twists my heart.. like so fucking pain.. fucking pain..
this is when i really miss her alot..
think of her alot..
feel fucking down.. sad.. that i lost her..
and the sickening thing is
its abt money..
fuck money..
she s a nice girl.. i just cant believe it.. i do have my imperfections.. i know of it.. but her.. money.. god damn.
i miss her.
i miss her hair..
i miss her smell.. (LOL)
i miss her looking at me..
i miss holding her hand..
i miss sitting beside her in the last row left side of the bus.. (cuz its bigger)
i miss her laughter..
i miss her voice..
i miss her smile..
i miss her pinches..
whacks.. tantrums..
i miss her letters.. (i still have a last one here.. didnt get to give it.. should i.. does it even matter anymore..?)
but does she misses me? No.
Has she moved on? Yes.
How? She s back with him. The Money Bank.
Does she thinks of me? Yeah, i guess.. mostly abt how she hates me to the core.. LOL
how ugly i look.. how POOR i am.. how lame and whatever..
Did she ever loved me? hard to say.
is she being evil towards me? Indirectly. like what she writes and everything..
all that.. maybe alot more.. but u still have that pain? yeah i guess..
shes the one i ever loved with all my heart.
Do i still love her?
......im like fucking talking to myself la.. hahaha..
FUCK MONEY AND HER TOO. HAHAHAHA